A Reality of Heroin, Addiction and It's Abuse Is

Last night I found a piece of a post I had started working on back in January and have added to it. It's official I guess. I'm back with this piece.

It was announced recently that heroin and opioid abuse is now the #1 leading cause of death in the United States for persons age 50 and under. This epidemic has surpassed heart disease, diabetes and cancer as the leading cause of death in this country.

The reality is that heroin and it's abuse is preventable and is treatable.

IF everyone can get on the same page.

We are learning that aside from all of the new information that it is affecting every company.  Companies are realizing just how much this has affected their workplace where drug-related injuries have skyrocketed and caused companies billions of dollars in workers compensation.  Companies are experiencing the trend that overdosing on the job seems to be the norm these days.

 It disrupts the daily workflow which can also cost companies a lot of money.

Last week I posted that I am once again working on a few pieces for this blog. I have been contacted by quite a few people. I hadn't realized how much some missed reading here.

While I am working on a few posts coming soon, I thought I would share that we on this side of loving someone with this addiction have always said that addiction to heroin and opioid addiction doesn't discriminate.

Heroin doesn't care if you are rich or poor, it affects both the same.

Heroin does not care if you were prom king or queen, very popular at school, or football jock, or the quiet shy person in school who had few friends.

Heroin doesn't care about your job. It doesn't care if you are a construction worker, banker, CEO police officer, politician or pastor.

Heroin doesn't care that you attend church every Sunday.

Heroin does not care how you vote at the polls. It is neither democrat or republican or any other political party one may be affiliated with.

Heroin does heroin care which gender or race you are.

Heroin is killing everyone and destroying lives. It is tearing at the very threads of the American family and the values of every family in this country alike; rich or poor and young and old.

Sometimes when asked where I stand my response is simple,

I stand on shaky ground where heroin and addiction are concerned. 

If you want to be a part of my blog I certainly welcome all. If you don't wish to, I understand that as well.

© 2018 Gossip Girl

Living in the Shadows of Stigma

I have started to clear out the old draft folder trying to decide which stories to keep and share. I started writing this right before the April blog challenge and wanted to share this. I was thinking of using it on the day of the letter S. Living in the Shadow of Stigma.

Loving an addict is a lonely place to be especially when there comes a time that you realize you have none or just two very close friends who have stuck by your side throughout the fight. I have lost many very close friends. I guarantee you, it is a lonely place to be. It's often bad enough when you're friends have deserted, it's even more devastating when your family leaves you. And yes, that is where I lived for a very long time at the corner of Loneliness and Addiction for too many years.

Me, oh I used to love to laugh. I could laugh at anything, joke about anything, write anything funny because I wanted others to laugh too. Along the way, I lost my laughter, that joy for writing something funny. I couldn't even laugh so why try making others laugh?

Besides my Higher Power, I have to thank my hubby. He stood by me through all of this when many other families have broken apart.

On the days I said I wasn't getting up he did not allow any of that. He picked me up and said, "not today." Had it not have been for his persistence I am sure I would have sunk into a depression. There were often many days we put on music and just danced.

There were many days we also sat and talked because we really still don't understand many of the why's, like why our son?

I had many days of setting crying, begging, pleading, questioning and a few times cursing at God, Why Us?

Living in the Shadows of the Stigma of this disease is lonely. In those shadows I had people tell me that they wished our son would die. When I came out of the darkness and started speaking out it was then that so many told me our son was worth saving. 

I once had someone tell me they were going to kill my son. I have had family members tell me, to beat the shit out of him. Sadly, you can't beat addiction out of someone by means of assault and battery. If it were that easy I would have done that long ago.

I learned last year some of the answers to the why questions. For instance Why Us?

I believe it is so that I could be here, right now telling you our story, finding information to help others who are in this very place- they too love someone addicted.

 © 2017 Gossip Girl

There are No Casseroles: Fighting Against the Stigma

Today we are only about a week away from the end of the April A-Z Challenge. I must say, challenge this has been coming up with a topic to write about for each letter of the alphabet and staying within the theme, but I have enjoyed every minute of the long haul bringing to you awareness of the disease of addiction as well as this heroin epidemic which continues to plague many cities across the U.S.

On this side of the addiction, that is those of us who love someone addicted to powerful drugs such as heroin we have faced many uphill battles. One of the battles is that of the stigma relating to addiction and especially to heroin. 

I wish not one other person had to suffer and not one other family had to go through the tragedy of

Church Pew Bar Stool

This past week a Facebook friend shared a video with me called, The Church Pew Bar Stool. As I listened to the words spoken it sure sounded like the speaker Clayton Jennings was talking about me. Not just me but in general people I know. What church has ever lovingly accepted us? What church would ever lovingly accept our addict child into the flock?

Then today, a story in our local paper about the heroin death that hit close to home for a local pastor. Right in the first few paragraphs, "According to Snyder, the funeral was different. Not only

Stop the Shame and End The Stigma

Many do not realize that those suffering from addiction are also suffering from depression. The two go hand in hand. Do people really think someone addicted to drugs and other substances wake up each day hoping to continue in their drug use? The answer is no.

When they reach this desperation, we on this side know that all too often the desperation leads to suicide. They are alone. They feel that all hope is gone. They want to get better but the drug has clouded their mind. They hate what their addiction is doing to their family and those who love them. They feel all hope is gone. Their desperation can escalate quickly. They are six times more likely to commit suicide. Their addiction exasperates the likelihood of them taking their own lives.

To those of us who love them, we continue watching as the disease destroys their bodies and their minds. Many times even when they reach out for help they hear, there are no beds available. Many have died from the disease while waiting on a bed.

When we say fear is real, it is real. Those with addiction problems often use the substance they are addicted to as the means

It's time to End the Stigma and Stop the Shame!

Video from YouTube
Suicide: One of Addiction's Hidden Risk
The Battleground of Anxiety and Depression

Please Don't Judge My Son

This poem was written by Rose Barbour Living In The Shadows in Prince Edward Island

The Stigma: When Will This Stop?

Lately I've read a lot of posts on Facebook relating to stopping ignorance and hate yet those of us in the stigma of the disease of addiction especially when it relates to heroin know that there is a lot of ignorance relating to this disease and we read the words of hate when it relates to an overdose death and the crowd leads with cheers.

We, on this side of the addiction weep when we hear that another person has lost the ultimate battle of this disease. We weep for the families who must endure grieving for their loved one. We weep for yet another funeral a family must endure. We weep for the children who have lost a parent. We weep because we know but for the grace of God this could be our loved one. We weep because we know that our loved one is walking on borrowed time. It is time for community healing from this terrible epidemic that has besieged our community.

Riding around this town I notice the many homes with their curtains pulled shut and the blinds closed on their windows. It's time to open the curtains and the windows and look outside. You will then see it is already in your neighborhood.

When Will This All Stop?

An Open Letter To The Addict Haters

Nar Anon: The True Stigma and Non Judgement Free Zone

When we first started going to Nar Anon we didn't know what to expect. After attending our first meeting we left feeling good just knowing we were not alone on this journey. There are others who share our pain of loving an addict.

It is a great feeling because for just an hour a week you are among others who know exactly what you are going through. We listen to others share stories, we cry together and we pray for each other in our daily walks of life.

If you are feeling at the end of your rope, broken, alone and feeling no one else can relate to you why not give Nar-Anon a try?

Nar Anon is a true Stigma and Non Judgement Free Zone!

Here in Martinsburg we meet each Sunday evening at 6PM at Trinity United Methodist Church in Martinsburg, WV. The church is located at 220 W. Martin St. in Martinsburg.

For more information, you can also reach out to the ladies @ The Hope Dealer Project.

© 2016 Gossip Girl

Stop The Stigma: Don't Judge

Stop The Stigma: Crimes and Jail

Here is another post in the Angry Mom edition of.... Heroin Epidemic in Berkeley County!!!


This post as you will see is a venting about a system that is broken. Not just here in Berkeley County or West Virginia. Everywhere!

That system you may wonder? The criminal justice system.

Many of the jails in this country are now privately owned. I believe our own jail systems in West Virginia under the "Regional Jail System" are privately owned.

I remember when they were county owned but I believe

Stop The Stigma: Addicts Are Humans

Heroin Does Not Wear A Mask

I have been thinking about this for the longest time. You know I think there are so many out there that believes that heroin wears a face mask.

I often read posts on social media relating to the disease of this addiction and to heroin abuse using the Walking Dead relating to it. Too many people are looking for the faces of...

If this is what you're looking for you will miss it!!!!

Take a good look at your spouse, your child, your loved one your friend does that person look like a character from the Walking Dead? So, just how do you know that they are not using and abusing heroin or other drugs?

The harsh reality is that you don't really know. So, stop looking for the signs in any character or slogan or you'll miss it!!!!!

Maybe that is the problem. Relating it to the Walking Dead and to zombies that is what some are looking for, zombies. Uh no. Look at the person beside you. Do they look like a zombie? How do you know that person is not using and abusing heroin?

The quick answer is you don't. That is because they look like normal people. They look like the doctor, the lawyer, the policeman, the clergy, the grocery store clerk. Heroin doesn't wear a certain face or color. Heroin doesn't wear a mask and is not a character in a movie! Heroin is real. It will destroy those that you love.

This is just one of millions of the real face of heroin....

And this my friends....

Is the harsh reality of the powerful grip of heroin on a life and what will do....

The words relating to this picture was shocking and graphic... they may be. WAKE UP!!!! This is the reality of heroin!!!!! Some of us live or lived it everyday of every week of every month!!!!!

© 2016 Gossip Girl

Stop The Stigma: Come To NarAnon

This is what NarAnon is all about too!

To those of us on this side of the addiction...

You are not alone!
You no longer have to live with the stigma of loving an addict.
Come out and surround yourself with others who share what you are going through and others who care.

For more information on our local NarAnon Meetups visit NarAnon Meetings in the Panhandle

pic belongs to BIG Recovery

End The Stigma Stop The Shame

Stop the shame of addiction....

Pain

Cravings

Guilt

Shame

The Toxic Mix of Shame and Addiction

Is It Any Wonder There Are Stigmas?

Is it any wonder that a stigma exists between society and those who are caught up in the addiction as well as those people who love someone using and abusing heroin when entities within the Federal Government cannot even stand on the same side?

As a blogger, I type many keywords into search engines seeking information and resources on heroin. We have a son who uses and abuses not only heroin but others as well.

I cannot remember now exactly what words I used to type into the BING search engine to come up with an interesting FACT CHECK on the heroin epidemic written by the website, Fusion.

By interesting I mean this,

The word fentanyl has now become a household word and the nightmare of every parent or person who loves someone addicted to heroin as well as among the groups who advocate. We used to only hear that word as it was associated with many stars in Hollywood who died from a heroin overdose now it is among us on our streets and it is killing people right here in Martinsburg, West Virginia.

The DEA calls it a heroin epidemic however in 2014 the CDC disagreed and said "NO" The CDC does not consider this an epidemic.

“We do not consider heroin usage as an epidemic,” said spokesperson Courtney Lenard. “Deaths rates from heroin overdose in the US were relatively stable from 1999 through 2010. We did not see the sharp increase that we would characterize as an epidemic.”

Now, all the other entities (the CDC and SAMSHA) all agree there is an opioid epidemic in this country but it's not heroin.

Now we who love someone addicted know that once our loved one is addicted it is often not just heroin. Our son was addicted to heroin first. Now it's a combo of heroin/opiates. Sometimes just opiates.

Other opioids and benzos come into action. Those addicted will combine other drugs with heroin just searching for the next bigger high. Heck, I just learned that our son is combining heroin, opioids and smoking them with Spice.

Is there any wonder that there is such as stigma around addiction and whether or not it is a disease? As well as the stigma society places on families and friends of those who use and abuse. We who love them come to that place when we have to call it was it is, a heroin addiction.

Why wouldn't these government entities call it for what it is?

Personally, I feel this way,  If they were to all come to together and agree, it would show a great failure on their part because from the late 1990's and through the 2000's heroin use has gradually risen year after year. We have the numbers of the overdoses and the deaths to prove it so how can they say there has been no increase? No epidemic?

Of course, this is just my opinion.

To read the rest of this interesting article...

Fact Check: Is There Really A Heroin Epidemic?

© 2016 Gossip Girl

If We Do Nothing...

About a month ago I held a Community Awakening, Memorial and Vigil to bring attention to our growing heroin epidemic here in Berkley County, West Virginia.

This event was to bring us all together in one place. That place is the site of the proposed treatment center here in Martinsburg, West Virginia.

About fifty people attended from various groups here in the county. All of us coming together as one. The goal I had in mind then is still the goal I have in mind today. We have to make them see in such a way that they cannot deny this problem any longer. This will not go away on it's own.

Although a month ago I still remember the words of Mr. James Boyd that day when he said,

"If we do nothing this will hit those who haven't even made it here yet."

Boy was he right. Yesterday I learned that three young people from our county who just graduated from high school six days ago are dead from an overdose. There was a graduation party this past weekend and from the stories I am hearing about it they apparently bought what they thought was cocaine. It was either pure heroin or it was cocaine laced with heroin I'm not sure which since our county officials- Sheriffs Department- has not come forward to the news paper with this story.

I am saddened, but I am not shocked or surprised.

I am saddened that another family is going through this; yet I'm not shocked or surprised that this has happened.

Breaking the Stigma of Heroin

The one thing we all need to remember is that HEROIN DOES NOT DISCRIMINATE. Heroin doesn't care about age, gender, race or religion. It doesn't care about rich or poor. It doesn't care if you live in a trailer park or a big house on a hill. Heroin doesn't care how your were raised. You can come from a bad home life or you can come from a great loving home. Heroin doesn't care about your job. You can be a laborer, work at a gas station, a lawyer, a doctor a nurse or be a CEO of a huge corporation- Heroin DOES NOT CARE!!!! We need to concentrate on removing all the stigma's that HEROIN places on those suffering with addiction.

These stigma's often follow them forever. When they are recovered what then?
With the stigma they have a hard time finding housing and jobs

If recovery is a second chance at life why then do we make it so hard on the recovering addict?

Poem: Dear Mr and Mrs Heroin

I DESTROY HOMES, I TEAR FAMILIES APART.
I TAKE YOUR CHILDREN AND THAT’S JUST A START.

MORE VALUED THAN DIAMONDS, MORE PRECIOUS THAN GOLD...
THE SORROW I BRING IS A SIGHT TO BEHOLD.

IF YOU NEED ME REMEMBER I’M EASILY FOUND
I LIVE ALL AROUND YOU; IN SCHOOL AND IN TOWN.

I LIVE WITH THE RICH, I LIVE WITH THE POOR,
I LIVE DOWN THE STREET AND MAYBE NEXT DOOR.

I’M SAFE IN YOUR POCKET, OR IN YOUR SYRINGE.
WHENEVER I’M MENTIONED, PEOPLE WILL CRINGE.

I HAVE MANY NAMES. THEY CHANGE NOW AND THEN.
BUT I’M SURE YOU’VE HEARD OF ME, I’M HEROIN.

MY POWER IS AWESOME. TRY ME, YOU’LL SEE.
BUT IF YOU DO, YOU MAY NEVER BREAK FREE.

TRY ME JUST ONCE AND I MIGHT LET YOU GO,
BUT TRY ME TWICE, AND I OWN YOUR SOUL.

WHEN I POSSESS YOU, YOU’LL STEAL AND YOU’LL LIE.
YOU’LL DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO JUST TO GET HIGH.

THE CRIMES YOU COMMIT FOR MY NARCOTIC CHARMS
WILL BE WORTH THE PLEASURES YOU FEEL IN MY ARMS.

YOU’LL LIE TO YOUR MOTHER; YOU’LL STEAL FROM YOUR DAD.
WHEN YOU SEE THEIR TEARS, IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL SAD.

JUST FORGET YOUR MORALS AND HOW YOU WERE RAISED.
I’LL BE YOUR CONSCIENCE. I’LL TEACH YOU MY WAYS.

I TAKE KIDS FROM THEIR PARENTS; I TAKE PARENTS FROM KIDS.
I TURN PEOPLE FROM GOD, I HIDE IN OLD RIGS.

I’LL TAKE EVERYTHING FROM YOU, YOUR LOOKS AND PRIDE.
I’LL BE WITH YOU ALWAYS; RIGHT BY YOUR SIDE.

YOU’LL GIVE UP EVERYTHING, YOUR FAMILY, YOUR HOME,
YOU’RE MONEY, YOUR TRUE FRIEND, AND YOU’LL BE ALONE.

I’LL TAKE AND TAKE ‘TIL YOU HAVE NO MORE TO GIVE.
WHEN I’M FINISHED WITH YOU, YOU’LL BE LUCKY TO LIVE.

IF YOU TRY ME, BE WARNED, THIS IS NOT A GAME.
IF I’M GIVEN THE CHANCE, I’LL DRIVE YOU INSANE.

I’LL RAVAGE YOUR BODY; I’LL CONTROL YOUR MIND.
I’LL OWN YOU COMPLETELY; YOUR SOUL WILL BE MINE.

THE NIGHTMARES I’LL GIVE YOU WHEN YOU’RE LYING IN BED.
AND THE VOICES YOU’LL HEAR FROM INSIDE YOUR HEAD.

THE SWEATS, THE SHAKES, AND THE VISIONS YOU’LL SEE.
I WANT YOU TO KNOW THESE ARE ALL GIFTS FROM ME.

BY THEN IT’S TOO LATE, AND YOU’LL KNOW IN YOUR HEART
THAT YOU ARE NOW MINE AND WE’LL NEVER PART.

YOU’LL REGRET THAT YOU TRIED ME (THEY ALWAYS DO)
BUT YOU CAME TO ME, NOT I TO YOU.

YOU KNEW IT WOULD HAPPEN, MANY TIMES YOU WERE TOLD.
BUT YOU CHALLENGED MY POWER, YOU CHOSE TO BE BOLD.

YOU COULD HAVE SAID NO, AND THEN WALKED AWAY.
IF YOU COULD LIVE THAT DAY OVER, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY?

MY POWER IS AWESOME, AS I TOLD YOU BEFORE.
I CAN TAKE YOUR LIFE, MAKE IT SO DIM AND SORE.

I’LL BE YOUR MASTER AND YOU’LL BE MY SLAVE.
I’LL EVEN BE WITH YOU WHEN YOU GO TO YOUR GRAVE.

NOW THAT YOU’VE MET ME, WHAT WILL YOU DO?
WILL YOU TRY ME OR NOT? IT’S ALL UP TO YOU.

I CAN SHOW YOU MORE MISERY THEN WORDS CAN TELL.
COME TAKE MY HAND, LET ME LEAD YOU TO HELL.

This was written by D.K.