Sunday, October 23, 2016

Sobriety Isn't About....

Steps Along My Shore

Over the past few months I have stumbled on a lot of blogs about addiction. You can find many of them on my side bar. One blog in particular stands out among them for one a few years ago I participated in the A-Z blogging Challenge in April. During one particular challenge the blog @ Mock Turtle Musings I haven't participated in the challenge for a few years. I may just have to set that for a goal in 2017.

For some time I used to also post for Alex J. Cavanaugh's group,  Insecure Writers Support Group where Elsie is a regular participant.

Writing for me has always been my outlet. I have several writings I have been working on for years. One day they may get published. Life just doesn't cooperate.

My favorite genre to write is humor. I love Erma Bombeck. I write humor so as you can guess dealing with an adult child's drug addiction hasn't given me much to smile let alone laugh. For quite a few years I tried hiding behind it until I just couldn't any longer. Smiles were replaced by tears watching my son struggle with his heroin addiction.

Today I posted several books on drug addiction. I am giving a shout out and book boost to Elsie Amata who is the author of the book Steps Along My Shore. A book about sex addiction. Elsie also blogs at MockTurtleMusings

Elsie says on Amazon:

"I started writing as a form of therapy. PTSD from the Relational Trauma of discovering my husband was a sex addict, and then learning about what happened in our short marriage threw my brain into chaos. Some days, I felt like I couldn’t function. Writing helped clear out my mental clutter.

All that writing led to blogging:

There you will find posts about sex addiction, writing, and whatever else floats my boat. You won’t find me bashing my husband. My blog is about a healthy recovery, and to me, degrading the addict doesn't feel healthy.

Blogging led me to write a self-help book. Sure, the book took a couple of years to write, but hey, it’s finally out there. Now I’m working on the next one. Don’t hold your breath though. It may be a long time. Who knows what I’ll do after that.

Thanks for the visit!"

Steps Along My Shore is available on Amazon for Kindle and in paperback.

And please stop by and visit my friends mentioned in this post and of course check out the book, Steps Along My Shore!!!!!

Over the years that I've been blogging I have met some great writers and bloggers. Alex who blogs at Alex J. Cavanaugh has also written several Sci-Fi books. I believe when I first came to the blogging world Alex was the first writer who visited my blog and gave a shout out.

Gracies Secret

Meet Grace. At nine years old she has a big secret. Grace knows first-hand that life can be difficult. Her parents aren't very happy. Their arguing is giving her a stomach ache.

She spends a lot of time alone, worrying. Are her parents problems her fault? Had she done something wrong?

Grace pretends everything is fine, but it's not. She feels helpless and has learned that making things up is easier than telling the truth. One big question haunts her every day.

Will her family ever be happy again?

This book is perfect for a child with a difficult home life. Divorce, addiction, mental health issues and more can cause children to feel alone, anxious and afraid.

Gracie's Secret addresses this by showing kids they aren't alone, and that they can feel better. With a workbook section for kids to understand their own issues and a message that talking to a safe person will help, Gracie's story can help kids cope.

A book written by Lorelie Rozanno and available on Amazon and is available in paperback.

Jagged No More

Lyndsey’s life has finally turned around. She’s clean and sober, has her dream job working in addictions, and is married to a wonderful and supportive man.

They have even taken in Billy, the fiery and unpredictable child of her old friend, Dee, who still battles with active addiction. But when Lyndsey begins to learn the secret about her own long lost son, the line between her personal life

Meanwhile, Declan’s hopes for freedom continue to be delayed. Released from prison on strict conditions, he finds himself in a shady rehab centre populated by a strange and questionable cast of characters.

No matter, he’ll just call his mom and sweet talk her into busting him out, like she always does. He hatches a plan with the centre’s resident drunk that should have him back on top and high out of his mind in no time.

He soon finds out, though, that Susan has no intention of giving in again. With Lyndsey’s help, she realizes that Declan isn’t the only addict in the family. Her own sickness has caused her to bow to his every whim for too long, and it’s finally time to set things right. Together they face an unknown future and the last chance to save what’s left of her family.

Jagged No More is the third in the Jagged series. From the desperation of Dee’s daily struggle to Lyndsey’s devotion to helping those in need, it shows both the darkest depths of addiction, and the light that finds a way to shine though. It is a story of life, loss, compassion, and love.

the ethics of her work begin to blur. Soon she is forced to choose between her own feelings and those of the people she is entrusted to protect.

A book written by Lorelie Rozanno and available on Amazon and is available on Kindle, hard cover or paperback.

Jagged Little Lies

Susan’s life was beyond broken, it was over. There was nothing left but a hollowed out empty spot she used to call her family. Dick, her husband, left and her beloved son Declan was in jail.

All she’d ever wanted was to have a happy family. What happened? Where did she go wrong?

Her days were spent consumed in misery, wondering. Restless in spirit, bitter and resentful, the ache became unbearable. Her only relief came in the form of a tiny little tablet. Miranda met the love of her life. Declan. He was gorgeous, sweet, and charming. His smile lit up the room and stole her heart. He was the best thing to ever happen to her.

Trouble was - he was also the worst. Without him she was
halved, with him, she might end up in jail.

On the verge of bankruptcy and being fired, Miranda wonders if she’ll ever be able to tell the truth again. Declan stared up at the ceiling thinking. He needed more dope and soon. The prison bars he was trapped behind closed with a final clang. The sound reverberated through his jaw and down his back. It echoed down the miles of endless hallways. His bowels quivered and nausea churned. Yup, he was going to need something fast.

He counted the hours trying to calculate how long before he’d be writhing on the floor. Six, at the most, but he could already feel it begin. Lyndsey, who never believed in fairy tales, pinched herself. She couldn’t have dreamed this big.

Her life in recovery was more than one she’d ever dared to hope for. When you’ve been on the verge of death, and live to tell about it, life could be so very sweet. No longer hopeless or living in despair, Lyndsey makes it her life’s purpose to help others. But will they listen to her?

A book written by Lorelie Rozanno and available on Amazon and is available on Kindle or paperback.

Jagged Little Edges

Jagged Little Edges. That's how it had felt for her as long as she could remember. Like cuts, coming first in words as they tore little pieces of her innocence, trust and self worth, evolving into the physical form with a smack to the head, a cuff to the ear and at times, welts and bruises on her back side.

By far the greatest damage of all was what couldn’t be seen. A soul torn asunder, left with an open wound, a vast emptiness and a hunger that screamed to be fed. Lyndsey wanted nothing more than to be on her own.

Problem was that's what she'd been doing her entire life. She didn’t trust others and always held a piece of herself back. Lyndsey knew something was missing and she was determined to find it. Not comfortable in her own skin and trying to fill the vast emptiness, she stood on the edge.

Needing to belong to somebody, Lyndsey discovers love, the kind of love that's sick and leaves her needing more. She'll do anything for him and does. Lyndsey learns that love hurts, but still, she searches for her happy ending.

Not able to find what she's looking for in people, places or things, Lyndsey descends into spiral of hopelessness. This story follows a ten year journey on the need for love and leads readers through the depths of despair and addiction. It will move and inspire. It will leave readers on the edge of their seat wanting more...

A book written by Lorelie Rozanno and available on Amazon and is available on Kindle or paperback.

Jagged Edges: Life Beyond Addiction

I am a book reader. Last summer I read 90 plus books. I am old fashioned. I love to hold a physical book in my hands. There is nothing like listening to the pages of a book turn or even smelling the pages of an old bound book!

Lately I've been reading a little online. I found an amazing author of books on addiction and recovery. Her name is Lorelie Rozanno. You may recognize the titles of her books- Jagged Edges a series of books written on addiction and the life beyond.

18 years ago I took the most difficult walk of my life – through the doors of a local treatment centre. I found in recovery, everything I’d been searching for in alcohol and drugs. Growing up in an alcoholic home I understand first-hand, the importance of a healthy family. I’m an alcohol and drug counselor, author, mother, wife, daughter, grandmother, foster parent, sister and friend. I’m passionate about helping others to recover from the effects of addiction. I hope the honesty found in my books and on my blog, will inspire addicts and their families to reach out for help. I want people to know there is hope, so I’m telling…on addiction!

Lorelie Rozzano is a recovering addict, counselor, and author. Her mission? To help those struggling with addiction regain their freedom and health.

Her books are available on for those interested.

Her website is @ Jagged Little Edges- Life Beyond Addiction

Also, visit her Facebook page @ Loralie Rozanno

Challenge Myself: Day #117 Skip The Latte

Today is Day #117 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to skip the take out latte and put the money into your savings account.

The book says,

How many times a week do you stop for that special large cup of latte?

Try this little experiment; Each time during the week that you feel the impulse to have a $5.00 latte at the usual coffee house, put that amount aside.

If you've been stopping every day, you are spending $5.00 per day, roughly $25.00 a week. or $100 a month. Over a year thats about $5,200.00 that could be earning more money. 
If you put it into an interest-bearing savings account.

Just For Today: I am happy with the little bit that I can save!

pic from Writalin
From the book: Live Happy

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Losing A Child To an Overdose

The Stanton Peele Addiction Website

I was just reading some information on another webpage which led to this website. Many of the publications in the library are free to read. Interesting articles.

Recover!Don't Panic offers parents a non-alarmist approach for understanding and dealing with adolescent substance use. In the place of panic, this pamphlet provides a sensible, human, and responsible perspective on raising children in a world where they confront drugs — whether legal or illegal — every day.

Many parents wish their children would never try drugs. But 8 out of 10 children will try alcohol and/or other drugs before they graduate from high school. Given that fact, what can a parent do? How can a parent prevent abuse? This pamphlet gives parents a sensible, responsible approach for raising children in a world where they confront drugs (whether legal or illegal) every day. It gives parents suggestions about how to prevent substance abuse problems in kids who don't have problems, and how to recognize and help those who do.

Stanton Peele is a psychologist who has changed the addiction field.

He has pioneered, among other things, the idea that addiction occurs with a range of experiences, recognition of natural recovery from addiction, and the harm reduction approach to addiction.
This site includes many of his widely read writings (see, for example, Why Addiction Isn't a Disease) and media appearances, including Oprah, Bill O'Reilly and Fox & Friends.

Created in 1996, this website is one of the oldest in the world. The goal then was the same as it is today: To make Stanton Peele's writings and ideas available to a large audience, for free if possible.
Please see the Online Library for a large collection of articles and book chapters written by Stanton Peele, or visit the Bookstore for his books. Stanton's Life Process Program is available as an online addiction program.

Info from: The Stanton Peele Addiction Website

Stop The Stigma: Don't Judge

National Take Back

Got Drugs? Turn in your unused or expired medication for safe disposal here.
We need this everyday

Here in Berkeley County, WV you can turn yours in to the Berkeley County Sheriffs Department on Raleigh St. in Martinsburg, WV

National Take Back Initiative

I Hate Heroin

pic from: Heroin Support

The Truth About It

About a week ago I shared a video that was floating around Facebook for days about the teenagers finding their parents overdosed. Personally for me I felt (and others who shared it) felt that was the reality videos that need shared and watched.

Stop using pictures of cigarettes and coffee in the classrooms and speak the truth about heroin and heroin and opioid addiction.

Our young people aren't losing their lives while smoking cigarettes and drinking coffee at the local coffee shop.

Dealers won't give your kiddies cups of coffee. They will hand your child a little baggie of pure evil.

Say it's name! It's name is heroin. It will rob, steal and in the end it will take the life of someone you love and care about.

If you've never met Satan, just wait until someone you love gets addicted to heroin!


Today I noticed the video is gone and the account of the person associated with the video terminated. Boy they really don't want the general public to see the real everyday life of someone addicted to heroin, or the real face of heroin and what it has done to hundreds of thousands of families each and every day.

In my opinion, everyone needs to see videos just like that. It is the reality for many of us who live it everyday. Why does it seem like there are those who want to hide it away?

Would you rather see a video of reality so that you can know the symptoms or a Disney made movie about it?

Folks, Disney doesn't perform at funerals!!!!

OR maybe this is the last picture you want to see of someone you love when heroin addiction has run its course and taken someone you love so dear.

pic from: legacyfreedom

© 2016 Gossip Girl

Challenge Myself: Day #116 Paying Off a Credit Card

Today is Day #116 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to pay off your credit card with the highest interest rate.

The book says,

Most credit card companies assess finance charges when you don't pay off your balance in full every month. If that practice is causing you to sink deeper in debt, start paying off those cards and stop charging on them, if possible.

It will take a lot of willpower and perseverance to get credit card debt paid off, but you can do it.
Make a list of all of your cards, what you owe, and the interest rate on each. Then pick the one with the highest interest rate and pay down that card until you get it paid off.

Reward yourself, but for goodness sake, don't charge it.

In 2001 I flubbed up bad. We sold a small tract of property and at closing I asked for the money to be applied to our credit report to wipe away debt. We decided from that point to live without credit cards or credit. We paid cash for what we wanted. We used lay away whenever possible. And we also used places like Rent A Center when we needed a new stove.

This was all not a good idea. Two years ago we needed a new car. We learned we had absolutely zero credit on our credit report with a very low credit number I believe like in the 500 range because nothing was reporting to our credit report. In our 50's we had the grand task of establishing credit once again.

We have had to rebuild credit. We got off the kids family plans and got our own cell phone plans as a starter. It has taken us two years. Two years ago we couldn't get a credit card now, it seems they are giving them away like candy. I could give an example here, but won't in case someone I am referring to is reading.

Just For Today: Giving up the worries and stress over the credit rating system!

From the book: Live Happy

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Petition: Make Them Wake Up

For Every Person and Addict: Finding your Meaning of Life

"Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste of time to be asking the question when you are the answer. We do not enter the future we create it."

video: youtube

Challenge Myself: Day #115 Start an Investment Club

Today is Day #115 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says form an investment club with friends to learn about money.

The book says,

The next time you and your friends bemoan the economy and how difficult it is to stretch a budget, do something constructive. Propose that you all form an investment club.

Learn about how to invest in stocks, bond, mutual funds and other types of markets to put your money.

If you don't have money to work with initially, make imaginary investments until you do. Track each investment made within your group for six months or a year.

Have fun while you learn about attracting money, working with your capital, and building your wealth.

Just For Today: I will not stress and worry about my household finances today. I trust in my Higher Power to help with my needs.

From the book: Live Happy

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Inspiration For Today

Parents Overdose On Facebook Live

If you are on Facebook this video may have hit your newsfeed last week. It is a live video of two teenagers who came home to find their parents overdosed on heroin.

Now, in my opinion they should have called 9-1-1 but they chose to video it and live stream it to Facebook.

Several groups I belong to locally in this heroin epidemic asked it not to be shared there do to the sensitive nature of the video. I ask why? Why not share this? If it isn't in your living room right now there is a chance that this will be in your living room tomorrow, the next day or a month when you love someone addicted to heroin, opiates or other drugs.

This video is real, it is live and does contain sensitive material, but if you love someone addicted, you really should watch this video so that you can see and know the signs of what to look for when the time comes that your loved one is in an overdose state. It could save your loved ones life!!!!!!!

I take it the forces that took over the Internet last week do not want anyone to see reality of what happens when you are addicted to heroin and overdose because the video was removed. What a shame!!!!

What a shame that we live in a generation of emotionally weak people. Does heroin care? Nope.
Heroin has probably affected you or someone you care about. Many don't know about it yet others are still hidden in the stigma this drug and addiction places on people.

Why does it feel as if everything has to be watered down because so many find so much to be offended about, including the truth and those of us who speak it?

video from youtube

© 2016 Gossip Girl

Challenge Myself: Day #114 You Can Make It Happen

Today is Day #114 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to write down your desired income and tape it to your computer.

The book says,

Do you dream about making a certain amount of money this year or next?

Write it on a piece of paper and tape it to your computer monitor where you can easily see it. Let it remind you of your desire.

Set a goal to bring in that amount. Develop a laser focus.

If you don't believe it is possible to generate that income from your job, get a second job. Better still, dream up new ways to create income streams.

Could you sell things eBay like the woman who turned flea market and garage sale finds into products that she resold on eBay to the tune of $3,000 in extra monthly income?

You can make it happen!

Just For Today: If I set my mind to it, and set the proper goals I too can make it happen!

From the book: Live Happy

I Am Still An Angry Addicts Mother

I know my son and our family has been through hell and back-

I am still the angry addicts mom.

I know my son went to a recovery program

I am still the angry addicts mom.

I know my son isn't using today.

I am still the angry addicts mother.

Many families are not so lucky to make it out of this addiction alive. I am so blessed to say all of the above.

But, I am still an angry addicts mother.

When I hear that an official said my son looks like his dad, but acts just like me-

What exactly does that mean?

When I hear an official who has heard our story and watched me cry has propositioned my addict son to make some controlled buys on the streets. Thankfully my son is strong enough in his recovery to tell them, No Thank You!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (as well as some other words)

I go from angry to a pissed off addicts mother!

Local Resources Fighting This Heroin Epidemic Battle

If you are like so many in this area due to the stigma about Heroin, Opiates and addiction you often don't know where to turn to for help.

This was posted on a Facebook Page from Debbie Hill Gray who locally is helping addicts and their families find treatment and healing from this addiction. If you live in Martinsburg, Berkeley County, Jefferson County and Morgan County you will find many resources locally to help.

If you love someone with an addiction problem, please reach out to anyone listed in this. If you yourself are an addict and are trying to find help for yourself please reach out. Debbie's post had the following resources:

"One of our Charles Town Nar-anon family lost their son to his battle with addiction last night. God knows I see losses daily across FB, but this one hit me hard. My heart is hurting so badly for them. He was very much loved by many people, but most of all his mom.

Please keep them in your prayers.

I felt I should provide some resources for ANYONE struggling with this disease or anyone with a loved one struggling with the disease. Even if you think your loved one does NOT want help, I assure you they usually DO. They just don't want to discuss their addiction with their family members due to the guilt and shame they feel. There should be no shame in this disease, but they still feel it. Most of the time your child will speak to someone they don't know about their addiction much quicker and easier than with their family and friends. THEY WANT HELP!

There are lots of people in our area reaching out to help with addiction. Some are moms, some are friends, some are in county positions, but there are resources available. I am listing them here again. PLEASE REACH OUT TO ANY RESOURCE LISTED FOR HELP: is the Governor's hotline, setup to help with WV's overwhelming addiction epidemic. They will help find a detox and hopefully treatment afterwards, even if there is a few day to week long wait. They have access to ALL treatment centers in our state and are available 24/7. They will arrange travel to the facility in most cases.

You can use their Internet site or call 844-435-7498.

Tina Burkey Stride and Lisa Melcher started a non-profit called The Hope Dealer Project and can also find treatment for addiction. Tina also facilitates a Nar-Anon group in Martinsburg on Sunday's. Here is the link to their page:

The Hope Dealer Project

Justin W. Ponton has a sober living network in Huntington, WV. There are many people willing to transport individuals wanting to go there. He cannot take anyone needing medically detoxed from alcohol or benzo's due to the danger of detoxing from these to my knowledge, but can after the detox from these. Justin can confirm this for you. His website is:

The Newness of Life
His phone number is: 304-972-6601

Tim Payne and his wife, Emily (I believe) run the non-profit, Turning Point of the Eastern Panhandle. Their website is:
Turning Point of the Eastern Panhandle

Katrin O'Leary is Vice President of: Magnolia New Beginnings, a 501c3 based in MA. Katrin resides in Florida.
Her website is:

Barbie Thrower is the Director of CRC in Florida, a Licensed Level III Substance abuse treatment center. Long term- 6 months to a year.
Barbie says: We are fighting hard to end this epidemic and remove the stigma of addiction!! Call 321-632-5958 or visit our website for additional information . God bless all who are in this fight together!

Although it is currently on hold for a short time, I facilitate a Nar-Anon group in Charles Town. I will be updating the site when active again, which I hope is soon. Here is the group's FB page for updates:…/…

I also have a FB page just to share and post educational information about addiction and provide support. Anyone can reach out to me for help there or add educational content. The link is:…/…

There are several support groups I recommend:
Katrin O'Leary facilitates a group for Addiction support, Magnolia New Beginnings, closed FB support group. Search for the group and request to join.

Kathleen W facilitates Covered With Love, a group comprised of people all over the country, coming together to help one another and their children. Search for the group and request to join.

I believe Dave Roberts and/or Cindy Everts facilitates "The Group", which is the group nobody ever wants to join. It is a support group for parents and siblings who've lost their children/sibling. They have personal gatherings also. Search for The Group and request to join.

Locally, Laura Haynes facilitates the Berkeley County Heroin Epidemic FB page, where you can find informational posts and support. Her link is:

Dee Stotelmyer Pierce facilitates the FB page Bikers Against Heroin WV Chapter. They do fundraisers to help the addiction community and provide other resources. Her link is:

Cindy Koontz has a blog page and puts together community vigils along with James Boyd. I don't know the link to her blog.

Amanda Edwards and Casey Hershey facilitate a FB support page called Soberology. Search for it and request to join.

Kevin Knowles is the Berkeley County Resource Go-To, a very important resource. You can contact Kevin at 304-264-1923 or 304-676-7731

I've helped people on my own time for years, heavily for 18 months. I started after trying to find help for my son, with such a difficult time, I was on the phone forever with facilities trying to get him help and continually was told NO or ADD him to long waiting lists. Finally I found a company to help me. They did it all, including making his travel arrangements to California. Today Matthew is well, thank God! He's joined me in reaching out to help those struggling with addition.

We help with any resources including;, faith based programs, scholarships (when available), find an insurance broker to help them determine if eligible for a special enrollment for private health insurance, help them get into top, trustworthy treatment centers away from our area, talk to their family members -providing them resources such as, RENOVO Center and Nar-Anon, speak with their loved one struggling with addiction to convince them to get treatment-no matter how long it takes, provide travel to state facilities, help them find Suboxone Doctors, take them to the hospital, and simply just listen when needing to talk. We do whatever possible to help.
Recently, because of our outreach, we both had several job offers, which happens when you are doing outreach. After a long time and a lot of soul searching we accepted a "salary" position with the only company we trust to get people into trustworthy treatment centers. We refused to take money per person, such as body brokers do. We cannot and will NOT see someone struggling with addiction as a $ sign, so we simply help people find help, however that may be, including state, faith based, and scholarship programs. I assure you we are not getting rich, we are making a living as everyone does at their jobs. We are available anytime at all.

We work for Sober Services, run by an amazing man in recovery himself. He puts many resources back into communities and is starting a "Jail Initiative" to help those arrested for drug related crimes get treatment rather than jail. This is NOT an advertisement for his company, my son, or me. This is simply another resource just as those above.

Here is the link to the company website:
He works with people all over the country. Matthew and I help with those in our area, but also any area in the country. Matthew Hammock can be reached at 304-886-8322, me at 304-820-5375.

Probably the most significant and new program available to our area is Melissa Swartz's (counselor) The RENOVO CENTER. Melissa was the only counselor in her office, but expanded her practice exponentially to help those struggling with addiction and their family members. She offers groups for family members on Tuesday evenings. She added case workers to help manage all phases of patient care. She added more counselors and has Suboxone/Vivatrol Doctors coming in November. She accepts Medicaid. I have referred many people to her, especially those who find inpatient treatment isn't something they can do or to help them in the interim until they can get into a treatment center.
I cannot say enough good about what Melissa has done for our community by expanding her practice.

Her website is:
The Renovo Center…/…
Her office number is: 681-242-8819

I am certain there are more resources I haven't mentioned, so anyone with more, please post them.
PLEASE if you or a loved one needs help for addiction, reach out to any of these resources. We are losing too many lives over this epidemic!"

Many thanks to Debbie for her time in putting this list of resources together.

I wanted to add to this that there are several recovering from their addiction who have joined in this fight to help other addicts. One of those people is

Click his name to go to his Facebook and message him on Facebook. If you are seeking help with your addiction, message Kyle.

Friday, October 14, 2016

The 52 Week Money Challenge

I don't know how many of you have saw or read about the 52 Week Money Challenge. I saw it a few years ago floating around Facebook for a few months. I printed it and we tried it.

We didn't have $1,378 at the end of the year but we did have about $800 saved which came in handy that year. In December of that year the motor in our truck blew and we had to get another vehicle. We needed $1,500 for a deposit down and had $800 of it right from the start.

The other $878 I would have probably had saved had it not been for enabling my adult children. The hubby estimates that is probably what I dished out to them and more from the Money Challenge Jar.

Image result for 52 week money challenge

pic found @ Pinterest

Challenge Myself: Day #113 Be A Money Magnet

Today is Day #113 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to close your eyes and imagine that you are a money magnet.

The book says,

Practitioners of the universal law of attraction say that what you think about most is what you attract into your life.

Instead of worrying about money, think of yourself as a money magnet. Yoke your willpower and actions to your positive thinking.

Believe that money from your various sources (known and unknown) is flowing to you.

Don't discourage any of the myriad ways it might arrive including checks in the mail, found money, gifts, inheritances, rebates and coupons, refunds, dividends and donations.

Personally, I am not certain this little experiment works. I haven't tried it. I meditate often but I've never meditated that money will be heading my way.

Just For Today: I will not stress about bills or money!

pic from Zazzle
From the Book: Live Happy

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Challenge Myself: Day #112 Balancing The Checkbook

Today is Day #112 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says that we need to balance our checkbook every statement cycle.

The book says,

If you bank online, you may simply check your balances each day and take note of which bills have been paid or are queued up for payment.

However, working with a checkbook helps you know at a glance what your balance is when you are not near a computer.

Be diligent about recording any check you write when you are making purchases throughout the day. Some banks send with your monthly statement a how-to guide to balancing your checkbook, and it's worth taking a few moments to stay on top of your balances.

When the monthly bank statement arrives and there aren't any scary surprises, you'll feel both relieved and happy.

I don't bank online. I do however like the feature that banks offer with calling to get the balance. Personally I still do things from back in the dinosaur days balancing the checkbook and using a spiral notebook. Personally, I set down with my checkbook weekly and balance it each month when the statement gets here.

Just For Today: I will not stress over it!!!!

pic from: cartoon stock
From the book: Live Happy

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Challenge Myself: Day #111 Tackling the Bills

Today is Day #111 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to set a timer for twenty minutes and tackle the bills.

The book says,

If you are like many people, you hate paying bills. Yet, you must attend to that dreaded chore to maintain good credit.

An excellent way to deal with unpleasant tasks is to tackle them as soon as possible. Procrastinating only invites your stress to increase. But relief comes as soon as the job is done. So gather those bills together, get your calculator, the checkbook, a pen, and set a timer.

Hunker down for twenty minutes or until the job is done. Then reward yourself with a glass of wine, a piece of chocolate, or anything that makes you happy.

Just For Today: I will not stress over the bills this week.

pic from: Life Is Funny
From the book: Live Happy

Monday, October 10, 2016

Challenge Myself: Day #110 Create A Household Budget

Today is Day #110 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to make a household budget and stick to it for at least a month.

The book says,

Do you needs to plan to get out of debt?

When you know where you are going, you can control how you get there. Start by writing down exactly how much money you have coming in each month and the sources of your income streams.

List all of your bills, starting with those that carry late payment fees or debts with high interest rates. Follow up with another list of your monthly needs.

Brainstorm low-cost ways to meet your financial obligations and needs, making your lunch instead of buying it, taking a thermos of coffee and forgoing the cup at the local coffee house, and carpooling instead of driving, for example.

Write the due dates of all of your bills on the calendar. Before you begin writing out checks, first pay yourself a small fixed amount to put into your savings. Live frugally but feel empowered as you watch the debt begin to shrink and your savings begin to grow little by little.

Just For Today: I will express gratitude for all the good in my life.

pic from
toon pools
From the book: Live Happy

Sunday, October 9, 2016

A Mother's Serentity Prayer

Image result for Heroin Addicts Prayer

pic from addicts mom

The Footwork of Recovery

Live Happy Dealing With Finances

It doesn't seem like it but today is the last day of the Live Happy-  In the Workplace Challenges dealing with careers and our daily lives in the workplace. It seems like we just started those challenges and already they are ending doesn't it?

There is another section coming soon that deals with Happy In the Workplace.

The next set of Challenges however is about Learning to be Happy Dealing With Finances. Once again I peeked and read some of them. The challenges do offer some good ideas. I hope we all get some ideas from this next set of Live Happy Challenges.

Now, I don't know about you folks, but I personally am not happy on the days that the bills start rolling in. I have all my bills planned out a month in advance on the calendar so that I can look ahead at them.

I don't use fancy household budget gadgets, templates or apps. I use a calendar and a spiral notebook and I do mine weekly. Somehow it feels like it hurts less to do this weekly. AND we get paid weekly so why not? It is easier for me to do it this way.

Have you found an easy way of doing your weekly budgeting?

Now it seems that all we hear and see the ads and commercials is about "saving for retirement."

Really? Just who can save in this economy? Tell the rest of us your story!

Honestly though we could probably save just a little if it weren't for our kids thinking that its just us in the household and we're setting on piles of cash. That we are not.  We have bills just like the rest of the people in this country. I just cannot convince the kids of this. They don't realize that when they come to us for enabling that we often take from our groceries.

Now, for most of us we could use some Tough Love to help us Stop Enabling Adult Kids

For me personally, Things I Have Learned From My Adult Kids

We know, we've all been there loving an addict and enabling them until there is nothing left.

I have told them in the past- we did it! We had to stand up. No one took care of us and paid our way through life. We had to do it all on our own. Yes we always went without. It is called sacrifices and we made plenty of those so that the kids didn't go without. Guess what? We made it!!!!

Our TV went to crap, our refrigerator is on it's last leg and what do we do? Well, we're watching TV on the little one from the bedroom until we can afford another one and we're praying for the refrigerator to get better.

It seems over the past few months all the utilities have went up yet again. Just where in the world can I find happiness dealing with the bills and household budget and the household finances?
Hopefully this set of challenges can help!

pic from: funny quotes

Challenge Myself: Day #109 Stay Updated In Your Field of Choice

Today is Day #109 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to subscribe to at least one industry trade journal in your field.

The book says,

Keep up to date on advances, breakthroughs, and new information about your specific industry by submitting to at least one trade journal.

Trade journals announce industry trade shows, conventions, and often round table or networking meetings that you may want to attend in order to stay abreast of the latest developments in your field.

In addition, you can gain insights into how to make your business even stronger and more competitive.

An added bonus is that you may find people through recruitment ads, blurbs, or hard news stories who might become potential allies or recruits for your company.

Just For Today: I don't have a career or a trade but I am happy that I have a job!!!!

From the book: Live Happy

Saturday, October 8, 2016

Challenge Myself: Day #108 Career Mentoring

Today is Day #108 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says to offer to mentor a new college grad in your career field.

The book says,

Image result for funny career mentoringIf a new college graduate has entered the workforce after being hired by your company, offer to mentor him or her. If you are a supervisor or senior-level manager, mentoring a recent college graduate can benefit you both.

You can gain an understanding about the business worldview held by him or her and their peers and also learns what motivates them.

On the flip side, you can help him or her learn about your industry, trade regulations, business relationship, and perhaps help him or her rise through the ranks more quickly.

It is a win-win for everyone.

I don't have a career, I am just an employee at a very large logistics and distribution center of a successful company. We each play an important role in the mentoring of new employees.

Just For Today: I am helpful to those just starting.

pic from Pinterest
From the book: Live Happy

Friday, October 7, 2016

Documentary Coming Soon! "Meet My Lover" *The Devil's Romance*

Coming Soon! This film is by a local independent film maker, Eric Oldham who also hosts Two Peas In A Podcast

I will keep you posted with more information!

video: Youtube

I Am An Addicts Mother

Things I've Learned From An Addict

Any lessons I've learned have proven to be due to getting caught up in the tangled web of enabling adult kids.

Are we the only parents who have a couple of kids who...

We flinch when the phone rings and we see it is one of our kids?


Have kids who act as though we have nothing to do but wait on them to call because they need us to do something for them?

Only call when they want something? Mostly just money

They need cigarettes, gas for their car-
they are unemployed and looking for work- really!

Act as though we have hit it big in the lottery? OR We have chickens laying golden nuggets?

Think that when they need money, we should have it to give them?

Paying for or funding a vehicle?

I have over the years loaned out two vehicles to one of the kids- He didn't have a vehicle and I wanted to help. We worked at the same place and he left me stranded without a ride to work on many occasions. I was also paying the insurance each and every month. He left it on the side of road abandoned  when the head gasket blew and I had to have it towed home.

When he returned my car it was totally gone- motor destroyed- he forgot to add fluids.

Another vehicle he put in his name. Never leave the title of your car in the glove box when you loan a car out.

And just last year I bought him a car because he was crying he wouldn't have a way to work. The day after- he wrecked it- and never returned to his job.

Although he asked me and begged me- I have never added a line to my phone for him. BECAUSE...

Twice for two adult children they asked to be added to our car insurance and they would pay over and beyond the payment we were paying. That never happened.

Providing a place to live?

If this includes crashing at my house on my couch- then yes- many, many, times over the years.

Bailing them out of jail?

Oh yes- this time he had the bail money but I got wrangled into signing the bond.

I can't do this anymore!

I have learned to give them food and feed them when they are hungry. Put a little gas in their gas tank yourself if you want to. Don't give in to money for any reason. What if the money you give them is the last high they get before they die from an overdose?

Get help from others. Call Help 4WV. Go to a NarAnon meeting. Reach out to the groups in the community on Facebook. Seeking professional help for your loved one will save their life.

By all means try to get your loved one into treatment. Addiction is a treatable disease. People do recover and they get better from it. The road is long but with the proper foundation in place and positive people in their lives they will long productive lives.

When you have to answer that phone ask your loved one if they are ready for treatment.

Treat it like the disease it is. Hoping your loved one will just stop or just say no will never work. When you start treating addiction like the disease that it is and you remove the crutch which is your enabling you will find it will become much easier to talk to your loved one about getting treatment.

With a good treatment plan in action this disease is treatable for life!

Callenge Myself: Day #107 Don't Burn Bridges

Today is Day #107 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says that we need to safeguard our professional relationships.

The book says,

The old adage about not burning your bridges in case you have to cross them again one day applies to your career; it's not in your best interest to damage or sever professional relationships. You never know when you might meet those individuals again and have to conduct business together.

If you are at least on good speaking terms and have shown respect, it will be a lot easier to establish a smooth working relationship.

Stay optimistic and do your best to protect and safeguard all professional relationships. That way, you can feel happier and more assured that you are doing something vital to keeping your career or job on track.

A long time ago I was told a life lesson. I learned the meaning of not burning bridges. This message rings true in just about everything in life from friendships to jobs.

Just For Today: I will not burn the bridges that I will need to cross tomorrow!

pic from: Pinterest
From the book: Live Happy

Blog Update For the Week

Hi readers to this blog! I'm sorry I haven't been online for a few days. Some of you have sent a few emails to me. I know I normally set something to publish everyday even if it is just the Live Happy Challenges.

My job took a little more of my time away from my blog unexpectedly this week. It's peak season where I work- the busiest time of the year! Over the next month and a few weeks people are gonna be getting in the spirit and getting their 'Santy Claus' groove on ordering their purchases online.

There are only two challenges left in the section on Living Happy in our Careers. The next section of challenges is about Living Happy Dealing With Finances. Personally I'm not real happy on the days the bills come, so I'm hoping this section of challenges has some good info to share.

Our son is still clean and not using today. He is out and about in the community helping groups like the WV Chapter of Bikers Against Heroin make a difference in this town.

He is helping other addicts in need. He is talking to friends and loved ones of addicts helping them understand this addiction.

I noticed a couple of weeks ago that he even speaks another language I am unfamiliar hearing. His message of hope in this addiction, getting clean, recovery and staying clean is like hearing him speak a foreign language!

He is also going to be giving me his story in the near future!

Thank you guys for your continued prayers and for your support reading my blog! I really appreciate the emails of support for this blog. You are amazing!

Monday, October 3, 2016

Challenge Myself: Day #106 Have an Exit Plan

Today is Day #105 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says that we need to figure out an exit strategy.

Most business today will have an employee come in for what they call, an exit strategy when an employee has chosen to part ways. This interview gives the employer a chance to see if or what any problems were that may have caused an employee to leave.

The book says,

An important principle taught in most small business entrepreneur classes is the exit strategy. Exit strategies are vital to consider when things are not going the way you expected, whether you anticipate striking out on your own or just leaving your current track.

Either way, shifting direction on your career track or deciding to move in a completely different direction necessarily takes some forethought and a plan, especially if you desire to make your move with dignity and grace.

Both will be important for your mental and emotional well-being.

You don't want your happiness (at leaving or making a lateral move) to hurt of inconvenience someone else if you can avoid it. That's where well-conceived, well executed plan can make a huge difference.

Most of those in my age group or older leave their workplace for various reasons. One of the main reasons why is that they are not made to feel part of the team.

Those in my age group also do not want to fail at their jobs. Older people will often ask questions about the job they are doing and ask if they are doing a good job. This isn't because they have no confidence. If they are made to feel as a failure they will leave for that reason also.

Take Note: A letter saying, Take this job and shove it is not a good exit strategy!

Just For Today: I am happy at my workplace.

Other Links:
5 Steps Toward A Strategy Plan

From the book: Live Happy

Sunday, October 2, 2016

A Nice Sunday Psalm

Image result for for he has collected my tears in a jar

Rising Up From The Ashes As I Cross Step Four

For three months now I have been trying to make a moral inventory of myself and my life in order to work on Step Four of the NarAnon program. This step hasn't been an easy one. It has forced me to look deep inside of myself and my heart.

I have concentrated so much energy into our addict and trying to control the situation that when I had to turn the focus on myself it was hard. Then admitting- oh no- not me. This has been the hardest.

When we found out that our son relapsed it released all of the old

Eight Principles of Recovery and Spiritual Healing

Blessed are those poor in spirit. For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

I realize that I am not God or any Higher Power. I admit that I am powerless to control my tendencies to do the wrong things and that my life is unmanageable without a Higher Power.

Blessed are those who mourn, they shall be comforted.

I believe that God and my Higher Power do exist. I matter. Only He has the power to help me recover.

Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the kingdom of God.

I consciously choose to commit all of my life and my will to the care and control of my Higher Power.

Blessed are those that hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be filled.

I openly examine and confess all my faults to myself and to God.

Blessed are those who are merciful, for they will obtain mercy.

I voluntarily submit every change in my life that my Higher Power wants to make in my life. I humbly ask to remove all of my character flaws.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

I evaluate all of my relationships. I offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for any harm I have done to others except when to do so would harm them or others.

Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called sons of God.

I reserve a daily time with my Higher Power for self examination and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life.

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake for they shall inherit the kingdom of God.

I yield myself to God and my Higher Power to be used to bring good to others, both by example and by my words.

pic from tumblr

Challenge Myself: Day #105 Bedtime De-Stress

Today is Day #105 of the Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today says that we need to de-stress before bedtime each night.

We know that getting a good nights sleep and rest is very important to our health. Often many of us find that hard to do especially with the worries that go a long with loving an addict. I know I myself spent many nights unable to sleep.

The book says,

After a long day at work, are you tense, tossing and turning while trying to go to sleep every night?

Release stress before you go to sleep and you may find that you are able to fall asleep more quickly, have better quality of sleep, and wake up more rested and refreshed.

There are myriad ways to calm your mind and let go of the tension held in your body, including taking a warm bath, sipping a glass of wine or warm milk. listening to relaxation tapes or peaceful music, doing some deep breathing, or praying to release concerns to a higher power.

Rather than living your life stressed out, make it a point to let go of the tension accumulated throughout the day so that you get deep, restorative sleep.

Some ways that I found is a calming bath in the evening with a couple of drops of lavender oil added. I also have a sachet of lavender at the head of the bed. I drink a cup of warm tea at night. I have a sound machine that I use often.

I just went back to work and found that I needed a few weeks of melatonin therapy at night to readjust my brain.

Do you have your own ways of relaxing before bedtime to fall asleep? What are the steps you take to get a good nights rest?

Just For Today: I will close this day with serenity and drift soundly to sleep.

From the book: Live Happy