A Meetup: The Gateway To The Heroin Highway

Mr. James Boyd a local advocate against this heroin epidemic here in Martinsburg, West Virginia will be hosting an event here in Martinsburg on Saturday September 17th at 2:30 PM. This event will take place on the overpass to I-81 at the King St. Bridge. This bridge overlooks what has been dubbed as the Heroin Highway here in Berkeley County and Martinsburg, West Virginia.

James is requesting that all who can attend please come out and show support.

James says:

Taking the Healthy Path to Happiness

We have about a week left of the Live Happy Challenges about Building Strong Happy Families before moving on to the next section. I peeked at the next section of challenges and I believe everyone reading will be excited to move onto this next section. The next challenges are about taking the healthy path to happiness.

Now I don't know about you guys but since January I admit I have let some things slide. In January our sons addiction took a deeper darker path and direction. We knew then that we were either going to have to save him or we would lose him to this addiction.

We concentrated so much of our time and energy on our sons addiction that we lost ourselves along the way. We know better. We know we have to take care of ourselves first. The Insanity of loving an addict is doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results.

We used to eat healthy. We used to go to the gym three days a week. On the days we didn't go to the gym we took longer walks in the neighborhood. We used to take our vitamins regular. I noticed several months ago that we had fallen into this slump.

So, I for one am excited about starting back on the path to happy healthy! I felt so much better within myself when we were eating healthier and taking better care of our bodies.

We are going to start going back to the gym.

We are going to start eating healthy once again.

I hope you will be excited about the next challenges Coming Soon!!!!

pic belongs to: altered states

© 2016 Gossip Girl

Challenge Myself: Day #68 Family Projects II

Today is Day #68 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is a project that will allow anyone of any age to be creative. Open up your creative mind!

The book says,

Here is yet another project that kids love to do. Get the whole family involved in making a card for that special birthday gal or guy.

A sheet or two of colored paper, paste, scissors, colored pens and some magazines are all you need to make a great, personalized birthday card guaranteed to evoke smiles of appreciation. Find birthday greetings on the Internet of make up your own. Use magazine images or words.

You may decide that making a card that says exactly what you want is way more fun than perusing dozens of cards on a store shelf.

Oh, and since it costs nothing when you already have the materials on hand, you have another reason to smile.

I myself love DIY Projects. I found a link for making gifts and who doesn't like getting a gift that was handmade?

The holidays seem some time away, but will be here before we know it. I like making some special "gifts in a jar" around the holidays.

Just For Today: Opening up my creative mind.

Here is a couple of links of Interest:

43 Creative DIY Gift Ideas
Holiday Gifts in a Jar Ideas

And in case you missed the first part, here is the link to the first part of, Family Projects

From the book: Live Happy

Guest Post: Addiction and Relationships

Today I have a special guest post by one of our local counselors here in Martinsburg, WV, Debbie Maiorano. For several weeks I have noticed some key words being searched on my blog relating to heroin, relationships, addiction and intimacy. I reached out to Debbie asking if she could help me as I am not a professional in that area of expertise and she agreed to a guest post.

Cindy asked if I would be interested in writing something on addictions and relationships. Well sure, I’d be honored!  

When I started to think about where to start and what to say I was overwhelmed at all the different aspects that could be addressed. But over the years of working with

Challenge Myself: Day #67 Healthy Family Competition

Today is Day #67 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is competing in the family.

The hubby was very competitive. He played church league softball for awhile in his younger years. The kids saw his competitive spirit and often challenged him. Back then the kids had a Nintendo, but they still went outside to play.

The book says,

Back To School Reminder: Our Kids Are Dying

Yesterday our kids went back to school here in Berkeley County (WV). Facebook reminders told us to watch out for the school buses on the roadways. I read reminders from driving carefully because of the small children on the bus stops to reminders to stop for the flashing red school bus lights.

BUT...

Up For Discussion: Do We Need A Treatment Center/ Rehab In Berkeley County?

Several readers have emailed me in the past weeks asking about the Recovery Resource Center here in Martinsburg, West Virginia in which Councilman Kevin Knowles was appointed Community Recovery Resource Coordinator several months ago.

Readers are asking and wondering when this will open to the public.

The Resource Center will be located in the same building in which county tax payers go to pay their taxes. On the first floor of 400 W. Stephen St in Martinsburg, WV

Some of you may already know that the hubby and I was invited and was given a special tour of the center several months ago. It was still in the early stages of...

WV Attorney General Continues To Fight Substance Abuse in West Virginia

West Virginia Attorney General Patrick Morrisey has been behind the front lines fighting and combatting West Virginia's huge opioid problem. To understand how West Virginia even got to this place you must look back to WV and OxyContin Express

WV AG Patrick Morrisey first went after, fought in court and won a large settlement against large pharmaceutical companies here in West Virginia.

WV Attorney General Patrick Morrisey says:

Challenge Myself: Day #66 Family Projects

Today is Day #66 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is to spend one hour working on a family project, or an arts and crafts.

What child doesn't like this idea?

Back when my kids were growing up we sent them to Vacation Bible School. Not just Bible School at our church, every church here in town. They loved the crafts and projects and for a time our house displayed macaroni picture frames and birdhouses made with popsicle sticks.

The book says,

After the dishes are done and the homework has been put away, turn off the television and turn on your creativity.

Get out the craft box and create something fun, whimsical, or beautiful with your kids.

Quality time with your children is never wasted. They need time with you to feel loved and wanted. Instead of allowing them to sit in front of the television and get bombarded with undesirable messages, establish an hour of family fellowship, and watch them thrive.

I've made homemade play dough for my grandson. You don't have to be artistic to be creative. If you have young children Lowes and Home Depot have projects for young children also.

Also if you live local don't forget the Be-Hive for kids 13 and under. Visit their webpage @ Be-Hive
The Be-Hive is great family fun. They do arts and crafts as well as learn fun and exciting things.

Just For Today: I will close my eyes, breathe and allow for some creative ideas to flow into my mind.

Here is a link to some kids project ideas:
23 DIY Projects For Kids

From the book: Live Happy

Recovery Is Possible

I have noticed for several months now that the stats for reading this blog is slowly rising. I often check out the stats as well as keywords. As a blogger these keywords are important to me to look at because it lets me see what readers are searching for here.

One keyword that shows up repetitively and to date tops the search list is

The Semi Colon: Did You Know?

I will be adding this to my list.

Miss Heroin (Take Me In Your Arms)

I was searching for a poem that I read a few months ago that I thought I had saved. It is called, "Not My Child"

I cannot find that poem now but I did come across this one and I wanted to share it. It was written in the 1970's and still today the author remains unknown/anonymous

So now, little man, you've grown tired of grass
LSD, goofballs, cocaine and hash,
and someone, pretending to be a true friend,
said, "I'll introduce you to Miss Heroin."

***

Well honey, before you start fooling with me,
just let me inform you of how it will be.

For I will seduce you and make you my slave,
I've sent men much stronger than you to their graves.

***
       You think you could never become a disgrace,
and end up addicted to Poppy seed waste.

So you'll start inhaling me one afternoon,
you'll take me into your arms very soon.

***
       And once I've entered deep down in your veins,
The craving will nearly drive you insane.

You'll swindle your mother and just for a buck.
You'll turn into something vile and corrupt.

***
       You'll mug and you'll steal for my narcotic charm,
and feel contentment when I'm in your arms.

The day, when you realize the monster you've grown,
you'll solemnly swear to leave me alone.

***
       If you think you've got that mystical knack,
then sweetie, just try getting me off your back.

The vomit, the cramps, your gut tied in knots.
The jangling nerves screaming for one more shot.

***
       The hot chills and cold sweats, withdrawal pains,
can only be saved by my little white grains.

There's no other way, and there's no need to look,
for deep down inside you know you are hooked.

***
       You'll desperately run to the pushers and then,
you'll welcome me back to your arms once again.

And you will return just as I foretold!
I know that you'll give me your body and soul.

***
       You'll give up your morals, your conscience, your heart.
And you will be mine until, "Death Do Us Part" 

~Author Anonymous~

A Short Disconnect

We went away again this weekend to take a short disconnect break from reality. I left my camera set on the table this trip. I didn't realize the camera had been forgotten until I wanted to take some pictures.

We had planned several camping trips this year. Life just doesn't always cooperate the way we want it. The first trip was to be Memorial Day Weekend. It rained all weekend so we decided not to go this year in May. We thought we could squeeze a weekend in

Challenge Myself: Day #65 Family Treasures

Today is Day #65 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is about making time for family and about gathering family treasures.

The book says,

There Is A Season

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

² A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

³ A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

⁴ A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

⁵ A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

⁶ A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

⁷ A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

⁸ A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

⁹ What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?

¹⁰ I have seen the travail, which God hath given to the sons of men to be exercised in it.
¹¹ He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.
¹² I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.
¹³ And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God.

Ecclesiastes Chapter III

Challenge Myself: Day #64 Communicating

Today is Day #64 of our NarAnon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today- the next time you don't see eye to eye on a subject, write your significant other a succinct message clarifying your point of view.

The book says,

The next time your spouse tunes a deaf ear to your point of view, try a new strategy. Write him/her a succinctly worded note. Resist the urge to name calling to point out a stubborn streak, or threaten.

Instead, create a lens for him/her to see your position on the subject.

Argue your point without finding fault with him/her as a person. Show respect for the others point of view, but reveal why you've arrived at the opposite conclusion. He or she is not the enemy.

Tackle the problem, not the person, and you may find that the other isn't all that attached to their point of view after all.

Apply the same strategy to talking with the other person and you may find they are listening.

Our boys were all three teens at the same time. I know when they were all home they used to do little things that made me a little mad for instance shaving. They would leave those little hairs all over the place in the bathroom. In the sink, around the sink and on the floor. Tired of cleaning up after them I started leaving post it notes on the bathroom mirror asking they clean up the shaving mess.

Another note I left a lot was one above the kitchen sink that read, "If you are standing here and there are dirty dishes in the sink, please wash them."

When the kids were home we had a rule that nothing was too big to talk to us about. The same applied to us, the grown ups in the home. The hubby and I have always talked. Now, many years ago we worked opposite shifts at work and it was hard. I often left notes for the hubby of Things To Do. We always make time to talk.

Just For Today: Keeping the lines of communication open with my family.

I found a couple websites:

How To: Communicate With Children
Effective Communication With Your Spouse

From the book: Live Happy

Challenge Myself: Day #63 Resolving Conflicts

Today is Day #63 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is about helping to resolve conflicts.

The book says,

Three basic mechanisms for dealing with conflict are avoidance, accommodation, and collaboration. Use conflict resolution techniques on a regular basis when you are dealing with family conflicts and disagreements.

For example, when you are putting masking tape on the floor of the family room in order to separate your children from each other because you can't stand their incessant arguing, do so with a calm, thoughtful, and respectful demeanor.

Show them what courtesy, kindness, empathy, and understanding look like. Listen to both sides and demonstrate your desire for a constructive solution.

It may be necessary to restate their problem, paraphrasing it in their own words so both of them are satisfied that you truly understand.

Impress upon your children your desire that a solution can be found. At all times, speak calmly and avoid being confrontational and aggressive. When the optimal solution is found happiness and peace will again prevail.

One of the biggest mistakes I made with my kids was when they had problems and came to me instead of helping them resolve their problems by showing them the ways I always became chief problem solver in the home.

My kids are adults now and have problems solving their own problems.

As an adult I have found it doesn't get better. Right now I have some things going on around me. 

Just For Today: I will not give power to my own conflicts right now.

From the book: Live Happy

Live Happy: Families and Home

For the past few days of the  Live Happy Challenges have been about parents and children and home.

I know there are several young parents who are afraid bringing their children up in the community around the drugs and this heroin epidemic. I know, they talk to me all of the time.

I just want all parents to know that You can do everything right and still have a child fall into the heroin or addiction trap. You can do everything wrong and have the child never try drugs.

Drugs and drug abuse has nothing to do with home and family and as much as people for years have blamed parents and made this look like a moral failing.

This... is a society failure. When heroin was first getting started here in the late nineties early two thousand, what was done to stop it?

Now that it is out of control, taking over our communities like a cancer what measures are in place to stop it's spread?

First and foremost our community politicians in all of these years never once offered the solution of a treatment center. Once they did a fight started and here we are today and still no real solutions in place.

Oh we can continue sending those addicted to far away places like is happening. It reminds me of the olden days of shaming when the young girl was unwed and pregnant so they sent her away in shame.

Society has criminalized the addicted so that even if they do stop using, recover and stay clean they have a hard time finding a job, a home. There is no help. There is no program of a relearning of sorts to get their lives back in order. There is only the devastation and hopelessness felt by addicts. This then leads to  emotions of failure, depression, anger, disparity, confusion and this is how the cycle of addiction which can and does lead to relapse when they can't find a job, or they are homeless.

Our own son is five and a half hours away recovering. Although that day is far from today it is only six more months. Six months to worry about what will happen on that day. Honestly, I don't want him coming back here. For one the triggers live among us. AND Two we do not have the rest of the steps in place right here in our community.

I know I shouldn't worry. Six months is still a long time. June felt like it lasted five minutes so his time there will be up before we know it and I am scared.

I hope he finds a job where he is and I hope he choses to stay and live right where he is.
© 2016 Gossip Girl

Can We Laugh?

Have you ever dealt with addiction issues and menopause at the same time? Yeah that's me! Yes my son is away from here at a recovery house but what I really want to do is stand in the dealers yard...

pic shared on Facebook

Challenge Myself: Day #62 Family Grievance

Today is Day #62 of our Nar Anon Group Just For Today Challenge. I am also integrating the Live Happy into my Challenge. The Live Happy Challenge for today is about family grievances and conflicts.

The book says,

Let each person in your family know that you care about the problems he faces and the issues he may have with you or other family members.

Set aside time each week to air family grievances. Avoid allocating blame and instead identify the problem and encourage discussion aimed at finding possible solutions.

There may be solutions that require sacrifices to be made by the individuals involved in the conflict. For example, a fight between siblings over a last piece of cake might necessitate dividing the slice between each child so each gets less but both get some.

By airing grievances and discussing options, you will be demonstrating conflict resolution, skills- a great real-life tool for your children and other family members to have.

When the kids were home we had a family night each week to set and talk. Now that it's just the hubby and I we talk daily. It is very rare that we have any grievances.

Just For Today: I am grateful for a peaceful and happy home.

From the book: Live Happy