|If Only, Just For Today|
Oh my, what we discover about our own character flaws!
If Only, Just For Today
Of course, I've moved on in my journey. I have admitted to my
Higher Power, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs in this addiction and the person that I had become in this addiction. The discovery not pretty, but I have to move on. I cannot linger there.
I moved to Step #6 and asked that my Higher Power first forgives me for becoming that person I didn't recognize anymore and asked to remove all those old defects of character.
Today I humbly ask that my Higher Power removes my shortcomings. I am reminded today that no matter how far down the pit that I have fallen, I will see how my own experiences can hopefully benefit others. I often get feedback in an email thanking me.
I say you are welcome but honestly, I wouldn't be where I am today had it not been for those who stepped out with me to say, We have had enough. We have had enough of heroin. We have had enough of this disease and the suffering of those we love. We have had enough of losing so many to this disease.
Sadly here in Martinsburg that continues. The losses continue adding up. The numbers of overdoses continue to trend upwards. Because of that, I wonder, are we doing enough? What more can we do until there are none?
Today, my son is still doing good. I give thanks! I am blessed. He says he isn't using. I have to believe him and allow that my Higher Power has this. Sometimes this is hard.
I am human. I tell my addict not to linger there, and sometimes a reminder will send me right back there.
I keep myself pretty active. I work and that allows ten hours in which I only think about my job.
I keep myself active outside of work. I still clean house, for now, two elderly ladies.
On the down time, I try to stay focused on the community groups and of course I blog- if only just to get it all out.
Just for today, I will just breathe!
This past week I had a moment to reflect back because April is coming fast. April- the one year anniversary when I made the decision to come out of the stigma of this disease. Just for today, I think back to those who stood with me on April 24th, I thank you. Our voices sure have grown over the year haven't they?